July 4th: Well first of all; let me take this opportunity to say that there is NO WIFI in my Washington hotel, and as such I don't know when these blog posts will be put up... They will eventually - even if it means the day I arrive home, but I'm gonna be datestamping each entry, just so that it makes sense, from here on out. I will be making an entry every day though, and so like I say; at one point or another in the next 10 or so days, they'll all be up to date...
Now that I've gotten that out of the way...
That is just about the GREATEST headline pun in the history of the world... Incorporating the blog name, and the fact that I've spent the majority of today in a train seat, journeying from New York to Washington DC; travelling all the way down the East coast... I spent the large part of the journey, sitting gazing gormlessly out of the window, at the constant cycles of darkness, lightness, greenness, and blueness, like a colourblind man looking down a kaleidoscope... Yes it really was as horrendously dull as I described it...
STILL!!! Today is the 4th of July, meaning the celebration of America's 235 years of independance... As it happens, I'm in the capital city of America, so the celebration here is just about the biggest about... For that reason, almost ALL shops and restaurants were shut... We therefore had to make a compromise, and the only place we could find even remotely resembling a restaurant was this little fast food diner on the corner of the street... Now I say fast food; but truth be told, there was nothing fast about it - we were sat about waiting for no less than about 25 minutes for just a bacon cheeseburger and fries each (hardly difficult to prepare stuff; let's be honest...). So like I say, we sat down waiting in the main restaurant, and as we sit down, I hear a squeal from across the room; heads thunder round, to greet a parade of cockroaches marching across the floor... My mum leaps out of her chair, and runs faster than I've ever seen her move before, right outside... She then goes on to question every single local she can see on the street about the matter; all of whom seemed relatively unfazed; saying that "it's normal in summer"; ALL of whom got a look of discerning horror from my mother, as she continued her quest to find someone equally disgusted by the creatures...
After eating, we made our way down by the monument for the big fireworks show... Now of course it didn't start instantly (we had to wait for about 2 hours while some unknown yokel loser kept singing her greatest country hits. Although I strongly question the definition of the term "hit"... I can tell you now that nobody of the million or so on the field sung along with her, and rightly so... the songs were shocking...), but once it did, I have to admit that the show was pretty spectacular... I mean, sure it started off a little slow, but finished with an almighty bang... literally... The fireworks were pretty freaking insane, it's gotta be said - those Americans sure know how to celebrate genocide; I'll give them that...
So yeah; after a highly enjoyable show, we had to awkwardly scamper back to the hotel, amidst the crowds of millions of Washington...(ers?), hiding our accent, whilst the drunk young murrican men sung (although I use the word "sung" in the LOOSEST terms possible) God Bless America, whilst vomiting on their girlfriends, and urinating into the reflecting pool... Ahh the beauty of American youth...
Thanks,
Kempo.
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